Thursday 13 Rules. . when you should stay quiet
I was going to do something about gardens but I can't find the camera and I want to take pictures of plants and make you guys tell me what they are.
In honor of some dumb, not offensive, but not particularly bright posts I've made lately, some rules about when not to post. Most of these are written with an eye at AAR and other spots where you might find bright readers who enjoy engaging in tussles.
Do not post:
1. When you haven't had enough sleep. Your message makes you look drunk.
2. When you're drunk. You come across as dopey.
3. When you're dopey. Remember dopey in this case should equal dumb, literally. How can you tell if you're a dope? You don't understand the gist of the other messages.
4. When you really, really care about a subject--so much you can't imagine the other person's point of view.
5. When you're irritated by your 9-year-old. Chances are you've spent too much time together by then and you're going to come across as a 9-year-old. You're turning. . .into. . .one. Oh GOD, please make me a grown-up again.
6. When you're too hot, too cold, hungry or thirsty.
7. When you've just fought with your spouse.
8. Sometimes, when you've just had sex, run three miles or won a big prize. If you're feeling like this is the best of all possible worlds and you're chirping in on a long line of posts about woe and the misery of life, stay out. They don't want to hear from you. You'll be lucky to escape with your life.
9. When you're feeling jealous because someone just had sex, ran three miles or won a big prize and is holding a "Yippee! ME!" Thread. You'll get pity but they'll all be rolling their eyes at the spoil sport. You know it.
10. When you are a troll looking for nastiness, stick to the political sites. Places like cutenessoverload people are way out of your league. They'll trample you to dust.
Or worse, totally ignore you.
11. When you really should be writing a rant in your own blog rather than posting a twenty page manifesto using someone else's bandwidth (although I don't mind, really. Come here and tell me all about it.)
12. When all you want to talk about is how great your new kitten/book/baby/husband is and the subject of kitties/your book/babies/husbands ended several days ago. Time to find a new board to haunt.
13. When you're a writer who wants to gain readers for her books.
In honor of some dumb, not offensive, but not particularly bright posts I've made lately, some rules about when not to post. Most of these are written with an eye at AAR and other spots where you might find bright readers who enjoy engaging in tussles.
Do not post:
1. When you haven't had enough sleep. Your message makes you look drunk.
2. When you're drunk. You come across as dopey.
3. When you're dopey. Remember dopey in this case should equal dumb, literally. How can you tell if you're a dope? You don't understand the gist of the other messages.
4. When you really, really care about a subject--so much you can't imagine the other person's point of view.
5. When you're irritated by your 9-year-old. Chances are you've spent too much time together by then and you're going to come across as a 9-year-old. You're turning. . .into. . .one. Oh GOD, please make me a grown-up again.
6. When you're too hot, too cold, hungry or thirsty.
7. When you've just fought with your spouse.
8. Sometimes, when you've just had sex, run three miles or won a big prize. If you're feeling like this is the best of all possible worlds and you're chirping in on a long line of posts about woe and the misery of life, stay out. They don't want to hear from you. You'll be lucky to escape with your life.
9. When you're feeling jealous because someone just had sex, ran three miles or won a big prize and is holding a "Yippee! ME!" Thread. You'll get pity but they'll all be rolling their eyes at the spoil sport. You know it.
10. When you are a troll looking for nastiness, stick to the political sites. Places like cutenessoverload people are way out of your league. They'll trample you to dust.
Or worse, totally ignore you.
11. When you really should be writing a rant in your own blog rather than posting a twenty page manifesto using someone else's bandwidth (although I don't mind, really. Come here and tell me all about it.)
12. When all you want to talk about is how great your new kitten/book/baby/husband is and the subject of kitties/your book/babies/husbands ended several days ago. Time to find a new board to haunt.
13. When you're a writer who wants to gain readers for her books.
I've bolded the numbers of all that currently apply to me.
Get your best 13 here:
Suisan has some amazing horsey 13'ers. It's another world, those animals.
Doug has some sex advice from a guy.
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NOTE: I cut the anonymous comments only because I was getting so much spam. You can still post on the left side if you want to bug me without telling me who you are. Feel free.
NOTE TWO: Send me your snark by tomorrow. I have maybe three entries. Looking good for you, Cindy.
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NOTE: I cut the anonymous comments only because I was getting so much spam. You can still post on the left side if you want to bug me without telling me who you are. Feel free.
NOTE TWO: Send me your snark by tomorrow. I have maybe three entries. Looking good for you, Cindy.
Note three. I have great pictures but the blogger is refusing to load them. Damn blogger. DAMN.
Ugh, this is going to show me as S.L., my blogger ID. That sounds like I'm a bank that lost its &.
ReplyDeleteI just thought I'd comment with that lovely tune from the RITA awards last year: Don't worry, be happy.
PBW
Good gravy, that fiasco was just LAST YEAR? Wow. It was a long long year, I guess. Long, long, long.
ReplyDeleteThanks! I was just starting to feel glum about not going to RWA and you have cheered me up a whole lot.
I've been trying to come up with something for the contest all week. Snark eludes me -- it's comes out either bitchy or cute. ::sigh::
ReplyDeleteWow, I just created another blog just so I could comment on yours. It's my first Blog that wasn't about #13. Am I virtuous or what? Of course, it might be more virtuous if I posted on it.
ReplyDeleteGreat list. Sorry you won't be at RWA. I'll miss you.
Rob Preece
Publisher, www.BooksForABuck.com
Back to Le Frogge.
ReplyDeleteI'm in an oh-gawd-I-need-to-get-laid mood. Does that mean I shouldn't post?
But then I would never post.
Doug! Sublimation time: git to writing that book.
ReplyDeleteHi Rob! Hello, hello! I hope you have a great time in Atlanta. (Did you see you got a recommend over at dearauthor?)
I'm usually irritated by my 16 yr old son.. or my 44 yr old husbank. (no, that's not a typo. ;)) Hasn't stopped me from posting so far - as a matter of fact, they've given me much fodder in the past. :)
ReplyDeleteThanks for visiting my TT! Mr. Potato Head thanks you as well! :)