SBD when holes loom large

I'm listening to a book on CD. It's a romantic suspense and I don't know if the author has done her research but she's got me. I believe her world of drug lords and kidnapping, although she could use a bit of editing. Some repetition, but generally . . . Wow, it's impressive and extremely clever in a lot of places. Except where it's not. Then I'm ready to drop-boot the book across the room (except it's on discs and they belong to the library)

It's one thing when characters act like dimbulbs fairly constantly. But when they're focussed and bright and yet overlook obvious shit? What the hell? If the author is smart enough to make that world and those people, she could at least make their flaws less obviously dangerously stupid.

The hero is the heroine's son's father even though the h/h haven't been together for years. The hero is helping the heroine rescue the son. He doesn't know the kid is his. I don't much like the hidden kid thing, bugs the shit out of me, but sometimes I'll let it fly. I can even forgive the hero for being an unobservant fool--although just barely. He can do math. He could at least look at the kid and think. . .hmmm.

But the one I'm ready to write off is the heroine, which is too bad because she'd done a fine job of fighting the natural TSTL instinct of most heroines in danger who feel they must act like proud independent gits even if they have no idea what they're doing.

Here's what she's done right:

-Found professional help and groveled to get it? Yes
-Fought her huge chunk o' romance heroine pride to do what has to be done? Done.
-Squelched her feelings about breaking the law? Yes.
-Just done what the more experienced professional has asked her to do without a lot of bullshit? Check.
-Not asked a lot of dumb questions at the wrong time? Check.
-Figured out his nonverbal clues and followed them? Yes.

In other words, for once the heroine is helping instead of undermining The Operation. Except with this shit. Oh, can't tell him the truth. It's obvious because they look alike but oh nooooo can't tell him the truth.

He keeps saying, "I know you got a big secret. You need to tell me everything. What's the big secret? Hey, whatcha hiding from me?"

Her latest response? She seduces him to change the subject from the Big Truth. ** (Ho hum. The screw scene wasn't anything better than Summer writes and I wanted the two of them to stop and get back to the suspense. Which is way, way, way better than Summer writes. Except when it glaringly isn't.)

My guess is some bad guy is about to reveal The Truth to the clueless hero because the father and the son sound practically goddamn identical in some descriptions. If she doesn't tell him about the kid before they march into the Mr. Big Bad Guy's place, I'm hoping Mr. BBG blows them all up. Get those TSTL breeders out of the gene pool.

Don't get me wrong. The book is a lot of fun (except I can't listen to it with boys around) and I'm with these two until the end. I just might hate them by then, is all.

UPDATE: ha. Less than two chapters later, she spills the beans. I can go back to rooting for their survival--that is if he manages to Forgive The Big Lie in time to avoid doot-brained behavior.

** It could have been worse. They were also killing time and distracted themselves while they waited, so it wasn't a what the hell are you two doing? the kid's in trouble! scene. As in this timeless example: a great Purple Prose Parody of Hero and Heroine Standard Response to Great Danger. Here's a hint: Great horniness.


  1. Yeah, I can't stand that "the kid looks just like you but you can't figure out it's yours?" plotline too. Reminds me of the new Superman movie. I can't be the only one who figured out that the kid was Superman's son at first glance. Grr. By the time he threw the piano across the room, all I could think was, "Well FINALLY!"

  2. Thanks for the link--I loved that one the first time around but had forgotten where I had read it.

    I don't think I'm brave enough to listen to romance on tape. I can read it, but to hear someone else acting out the parts would cause me to laugh mightily, I'm afraid. 'Course, now that I think about it, I seem to always snicker at books I'm listening to anyway. Sometimes the readers are Soooo sincere.

  3. I'm like Suisan -- romance on tape/disc doesn't work for me. Although, really, fiction generally doesn't work for me on tape. Too many characters for a single reader, or maybe two readers, to accurately portray.

    Nonfiction? Fine on tape. I especially liked Jacques Pepin's autobiography, which he introduced and then was read by a Frenchman. The history and the delicious-sounding food. Mmmm.

  4. I usually do kids' books on tape because there are kids wandering around--and because some of them are awesome (Tim Curry!)

    My husband listens to books when he runs and he got this, thinking it was mystery suspense. It is, but the romance is in there along with breathing in each others' yeasty scents and whatnot right up to shattering climaxes.

    Not what I want booming through the kitchen as I make dinner. But I wouldn't want Pepin then either. Bad enough that all we eat are noodles. . . .

  5. No, no Pepin in the kitchen. But it was good to drive to.


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