kate rothwell

ESPN2 is featuring Rock, Paper, Scissors championship. No, I shit you not. mike: this makes my eyes hurt. boy1: it makes my brain hurt. mike: Instant replay? Who the fuck are all those people? boy1: They must be drunk? boy3 wanders into room: What's that they-- boy1 : shh shh, I'm trying to hear this. That guy's a longshot? Wow. mike: You're right. Look at all those beer bottles all-- boy1: shh, shh. Fifty grand is at stake tonight? Go Landshark! Won it with a scissors. me: For god's sake, turn it off, Mike, he's starting to pay attention. Mike switches to Red Sox. boy1 : Actually I saw that in a Far Side. No really, I'm not kidding. A Far Side comic about competitive rock paper scissors. My brain hurts. mike: Why were those people there? Why were they clapping? boy1: My brain hurts. (whimpering) You know what's even worse? I really want to go back to that to see who wins. me: I knew it. boy1: I hurt on the inside. (more whimpering) Turn ba...

Oh Lordy, the store is gone .. Here are other things that do--or don't, but should--choke me up: 1. I used to pass a high school (years ago we're talking) when the buses left to haul the kids home, and the sight of all those big yellow buses just made me feel all choked up, the way some people feel when they see the flag. A kind of proud to be a part of it thing. Now I have kids who ride those buses, and my only reaction when I see the big yellow line is, "crap. I have to wait forever." No more snivelling. 2. Kiss of the Spiderwoman . For some reason that movie reduced me to such a puddle, I had to wait to leave the theater until long after the credits. That kind of total melt down never happened before with a movie and hasn't since. 3. Ch arlotte's Web . The book. My husband had never read it so I read it aloud to him when we went on a trip. We got to the end and he had to pull over because we were both snuffling. He wouldn't admit it, though. 4. Casablan...