me: Talk like a gypsy.
boy: Huh?
me: I want to enter this guy's contest on his blog and have to talk about gypsies.
boy: What about gypsies?
me: I have no idea either. [I was going to mention the Singing Tree and how annoyed I was by it when I was a kid because of the way-too-perfect heroine who had my name, but she was Hungarian. Not Rom (or is it Roma? Is that plural only).]
boy: Yeah, so? Why bother?
me: So how about you say something that makes you sound Rom. Or maybe like that guy in the movie we watched. Everything is Illuminated. I do this, we might win music from that movie.
boy: That music ROCKED.
me: Yup. I have to discuss gypsies in my blog and--
boy: Menny gurlz wish to be carnal with me.
me: Okay. Good enough.
boy: On account of my premium dancing. Haff jew seen my seeink eye beech? Hey beech! Do you know I am carnal with many gurlz? I disseminate much currency so as to be carnal with many gurlz.
me: Enough!
boy: Hey leetle broozer, do you know many gurlz--

The boy continues to use the words "carnal" and "beech" as many times as possible in a really bad sort of Eastern European accent.

He did this for a long time. We suffered for this entry, Douglas. We better win.


  1. Certainly takes the prize for FUNNIEST entry, Kate. I don't think I'd want to know about my son's carnality, nor much about his beech.

    I wish everyone could win a Gogol Bordello CD, but I think my wife would kill me if I did that.

  2. No matter how many times I read "On account of my premium dancing" and "disseminate much currency," I still laugh like a loon.

    Your kid is a comic genius.

  3. Much as I would love to give him credit for the lines, they're straight from the movie (actually straight from the book). The accent however is from nowhere on this planet.

  4. I didn't know they made Everything is Illuminated into a movie. We're talking the book by Jonathan Safran Foer, right? Or something else entirely? (I should check this in IMDB before I look like too much of an idiot, shouldn't I?)

    Still: Premium dancing. Hee!

  5. Hey Candy, yup, same book, same movie. Rent it. It's worth it just for Eugene Hutz.


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