SBD pity the poor smut writer (not G rated)
Doug did that search for orgasms a while back--not enough people found good samples for him. But back then I went looking for some on my bookshelf.
Jeepers, how many ways can you describe a glorified sneeze?
Anticipation, growing awareness, the inability to retreat, the body seizes control. The body seizes . . . ah ah ah ahaaah TCHOO.
Stars! Falling to pieces! Seeing heaven! (Stars!) I think I'm going to go find some books, and write the orgasms. You guess who wrote which. And guess if it's marketed as erotica or romance. I'm taking out proper names in the writing selections--in case some of you have actually read some of these.
Except for the Kate and Summer stuff, I didn't actually LOOK. I just grabbed some books I had on the shelves (or on this computer). Turns out my shelves are filled with long, breathless descriptions of Basic Reproduction: Step One. Here are some of the shorter ones.
1. She clung to him as the final shattering crash of pleasure broke over her. He cried her name and braced himself on rigid arms as his hot seed spilled into her womb. . .They existed for a glorious moment as one being, entwined and complete for all eternity.
2. She bucked up against his mouth, her orgasm coming quickly and taking her by surprise. She arched against his restraining hands at her hips then came down with a jerk on the bed. Light pulsed behind her eyes. Sparks from her clitoris shot through her nerve endings to her entire body. The pleasure was so intense it hurt and she let out a high-pitched yowl then subsided into sobbing gasps.
3. At the same time another orgasm slammed through her body. A voice cried out. She didn not know who it belonged to, her or him. His heartbeat was hers, her flesh was his, the orgasm that ripped through them was theirs.
4. Suddenly he was falling, down and down, into a vortex of darkness and light. He cried out, a cry of ecstasy and despair, because he knew when it was over she would retreat from him once more.
5. Her legs clamped his waist and she gave a gruff little cry—she sounded less amazed than before. More of a purr of satisfied recognition.
Ah good. Her inner walls clutched tighter, throbbing, pushing him to the edge. He loosened his control and let himself fly as he thrust into her. The last time.
6. He exploded. His own shout was harsh and filled with satisfaction. He pressed his face into her neck, filling himself with the scent of her, holding her as close as he could manage without hurting her.
7. And then at the very second she nearly screamed aloud with frustrated need, the rush of relief crashed through her. "Oh! That's it," she gasped.
a. Unexpected Lori Foster
b. Every Whispered Word Karen Monk
c. Celtic Fire Joy Nash
d. Somebody Wonderful Kate Rothwell
e. Gabriel's Woman Robin Shone.
f. Seasons of Love Bonnie Dee
g. Futurelove Summer Devon
Jeepers, how many ways can you describe a glorified sneeze?
Anticipation, growing awareness, the inability to retreat, the body seizes control. The body seizes . . . ah ah ah ahaaah TCHOO.
Stars! Falling to pieces! Seeing heaven! (Stars!) I think I'm going to go find some books, and write the orgasms. You guess who wrote which. And guess if it's marketed as erotica or romance. I'm taking out proper names in the writing selections--in case some of you have actually read some of these.
Except for the Kate and Summer stuff, I didn't actually LOOK. I just grabbed some books I had on the shelves (or on this computer). Turns out my shelves are filled with long, breathless descriptions of Basic Reproduction: Step One. Here are some of the shorter ones.
1. She clung to him as the final shattering crash of pleasure broke over her. He cried her name and braced himself on rigid arms as his hot seed spilled into her womb. . .They existed for a glorious moment as one being, entwined and complete for all eternity.
2. She bucked up against his mouth, her orgasm coming quickly and taking her by surprise. She arched against his restraining hands at her hips then came down with a jerk on the bed. Light pulsed behind her eyes. Sparks from her clitoris shot through her nerve endings to her entire body. The pleasure was so intense it hurt and she let out a high-pitched yowl then subsided into sobbing gasps.
3. At the same time another orgasm slammed through her body. A voice cried out. She didn not know who it belonged to, her or him. His heartbeat was hers, her flesh was his, the orgasm that ripped through them was theirs.
4. Suddenly he was falling, down and down, into a vortex of darkness and light. He cried out, a cry of ecstasy and despair, because he knew when it was over she would retreat from him once more.
5. Her legs clamped his waist and she gave a gruff little cry—she sounded less amazed than before. More of a purr of satisfied recognition.
Ah good. Her inner walls clutched tighter, throbbing, pushing him to the edge. He loosened his control and let himself fly as he thrust into her. The last time.
6. He exploded. His own shout was harsh and filled with satisfaction. He pressed his face into her neck, filling himself with the scent of her, holding her as close as he could manage without hurting her.
7. And then at the very second she nearly screamed aloud with frustrated need, the rush of relief crashed through her. "Oh! That's it," she gasped.
a. Unexpected Lori Foster
b. Every Whispered Word Karen Monk
c. Celtic Fire Joy Nash
d. Somebody Wonderful Kate Rothwell
e. Gabriel's Woman Robin Shone.
f. Seasons of Love Bonnie Dee
g. Futurelove Summer Devon
When my guy finally does it, I think I'll make him "whine like a spanked puppy."
ReplyDeleteWhat do you think? Sexy or not?
Oh, I'm pretty sure 6 is yours.
ReplyDeleteSpanked puppy squeals? Hmmm. Must be an audience hot for that. There're audiences for all sorts of experiences.
ReplyDeleteAnd you'd be wrong about six. Neither Kate nor Summer.
I think #2 is Robin Schone.
ReplyDeleteI think #5 is one of yours.
And I think #4 is Bonnie Dee (I read Bone Deep on yours, and others', recs.)
Other than that, I got nothin'.
1. g
ReplyDelete2. f
3. e
4. b
5. a
6. d
7. c
(I am so guessing on ALL of these, but someone needs to take this quiz, motherfuckers, so COME ON.)
Hmmmm....
ReplyDelete1. c
2. a
3. d
4. f
5. g
6. b
7. e
...Fiona...
I've got nothin', but I blame the Moaksh.
ReplyDelete1. Moby-Dick by Hermann Melville
ReplyDelete2. The Age of Innocence by Edith Wharton
3. One of the Left Behind books by Tim Le Haye (they all seem to be the same to me)
4. The Well of Loneliness by Radcliffe Hall
5. Mrs Dalloway by Virginia Woolf
6. The Virginian by Owen Wister
7. The Sound and the Fury by William Faulkner
8. The Ballad of the Sad Café by Carson McCullers
All from the unexpurgated versions, of course.
1 c Joy Nash--romance
ReplyDelete2 f Bonnie Dee--erotica (I think. Could be romance.)
3 e Robin Schone--erotica (it's the woman's 10th? 11th? orgasm that night)
4 b Karen Monk--romance
5 g Summer Devon--erotica
6 a Lori Foster--erotica
7 g Kate Rothwell--romance
I showed the light o' my life this entry of yours, and we ended up having an almost two-hour-long debate about sex scenes, purple prose, writing styles in literary fiction vs. genre fiction, the role sex plays in romantic love, and subtlety, irony and self-consciousness in genre fiction. I didn't get to sleep until 2:30. TWO THIRTY. After spending six hours at a test center.
ReplyDeleteIt's all your fault. That'll teach me to check your blog right before bedtime.
I kinda wish I'd recorded or transcribed what we said. I kicked his ass on some points, he kicked mine in others.