Another Reason to Love the Internet
WARNING: another Body Parts Discussion, kids. Go Away Before You Get Grossed Out.
A while back I had a "name that body part for women" post. I complained that there were lots of slang terms for the penis, nada for the labia.
I guess I didn't look enough. For some reason I ran across this page today. What was I doing?early morning research? Oh no, I know. I read the phrase "panty hamster" and had to look it up--it's there, all right.
Anyway, that page has nick-names for womanly parts dressed, undressed, pre- and post-coital, on the rag, etc. It even has a list of nick-names for the part of the body between the genitalia and the anus. ("The perineum" for those who care about accuracy. The "taint" or "gruntle", for those who don't.)
here's a small selection from the infamous dirty slang page [their name, not mine]:
Labia visible through clothing
• Beetle's bonnet
• Camel's toe
• Monkey's chin
• Shark's fin (swimsuit display)
• Mumblers (When they can be seen moving through the clothing, but you can't understand a word they are saying.)
There's more of course. Breasts, men's parts and of course, references to other sites for futher exploration. From the page:
See Cameltoe.org for the pinnacle of this field of study.
Slang for Masturbation
• Check out this random wanking term generator for some automated humor.
• Tremble before this uber list of more than 1500 wankisms. Yes, 1500. No shit. They're even alphabetical.
oh, I love the internet and if the govmint messes around with my right to read 1500 wankisms, I'm gonna march in protest. Of course I protest at the drop of a hat, usually about less serious matters like war.
A while back I had a "name that body part for women" post. I complained that there were lots of slang terms for the penis, nada for the labia.
I guess I didn't look enough. For some reason I ran across this page today. What was I doing?early morning research? Oh no, I know. I read the phrase "panty hamster" and had to look it up--it's there, all right.
Anyway, that page has nick-names for womanly parts dressed, undressed, pre- and post-coital, on the rag, etc. It even has a list of nick-names for the part of the body between the genitalia and the anus. ("The perineum" for those who care about accuracy. The "taint" or "gruntle", for those who don't.)
here's a small selection from the infamous dirty slang page [their name, not mine]:
Labia visible through clothing
• Beetle's bonnet
• Camel's toe
• Monkey's chin
• Shark's fin (swimsuit display)
• Mumblers (When they can be seen moving through the clothing, but you can't understand a word they are saying.)
There's more of course. Breasts, men's parts and of course, references to other sites for futher exploration. From the page:
See Cameltoe.org for the pinnacle of this field of study.
Slang for Masturbation
• Check out this random wanking term generator for some automated humor.
• Tremble before this uber list of more than 1500 wankisms. Yes, 1500. No shit. They're even alphabetical.
oh, I love the internet and if the govmint messes around with my right to read 1500 wankisms, I'm gonna march in protest. Of course I protest at the drop of a hat, usually about less serious matters like war.
You may want to post a warning about how much time it's going to take up when your readers start following the links.
ReplyDeleteI realize that I live in a vacuum.
But, thx to you, now I'm in the know.
Have a great weekend.
Kate: while we're traveling on the edges of the politically uncorrect, you might want to check out 'the best blonde joke ever.' I've linked to it at my blog.
Purple-headed womb broom?!?!!!!
ReplyDeleteMy life is immeasurably enriched. Thank you, Kate.
Ah, I see I haven't been writing enough about sex lately, and my twin had to take up the slack. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteI've been in love with cameltoe.org for a long time. In high school, we called 'em "crackers" (since everything was cinched up into the crack). And I trust you've heard the pseudo-Beach Boys Camel Toe song?
Your hit counter should soar, babe.
I like the random wanking term generator best although I don't know why they call it humor. It's rich with writerly possibilities.
ReplyDeleteSeriously. This stuff is so much more...um...alive? lively? packed with vivid language than the rest of English. I wonder if that's true in other languages too. Gabriele? If you're around? How about German?
and Nienke and Doug?
ReplyDeleteI do love that joke, sort of.
I'm linking to this, by the way. Come on over.
ReplyDeleteKate,
ReplyDeleteI suppose there are a number of words, but I don't read purple romances, and I'm so not into dirty talk that I know only few.
We have a version of pussy, Muschi (which is also a common cat name). Fotze (cunt) is very vulgar and if used to name not the body part but a woman, will get you a heavy fine.
Goethe used niedliches Fötzchen (cute cuntie) in one of his poems; the diminuitive is less vulgar.
Golly, a fine? If you say it aloud or if you write it? I suppose the only way to get that kind of fine is to broadcast it on the air.
ReplyDeleteBTW, I don't think the language in most purple romances is nearly as inventive as some of those terms. ON the other hand, we're talking about the goal of pre-adolescent humor laughs rather than titillation.
"humor laughs"? and this English is my native tongue?
ReplyDeleteMaybe I'm still shell-shocked--I just went out and bought a washing machine. Oy.
Fotze reminds me of the Yiddish Futz, which I always thought meant "fart", as in "he's an old futz," or "futzing around." Interesting.
ReplyDeleteLol, Kate,
ReplyDeleteat least if you're a Prince of Hannover and call a journalist such things. ;-)
Doug,
fart is Furz in German.
You have to stop making me surf to all these sites. I am supposed to be WORKING.
ReplyDeleteI hope the government shuts me out of the internet - then maybe I can get some books written, lol.
(Nudging Kate in the ribs)
ReplyDeletePssst. Wake up. Ask the DH the title of his favorite college biology text.
Okay, you can go back to sleep now.
The shorter version of the email I sent:
ReplyDeleteThe best book for a year-long introductory college biology majors textbook is "Biology" by Campbell & others, from Benjamin Cummings. Boy One's AP Biology class is using the fifth edition (1999), by Campbell, Reece, and Mitchell (ISBN 0-8053-3044-5).