stuff, or more evidence of masochism

Unrequited Lurve. Another rejection and hey, maybe she reads my blog because she did exactly what I asked for in a rejection. She said nice things about my writing and she added, politely, too bad because my stories don't match her needs. In other words, don't waste our time. AND she wrote back fast. I have to love her even if (sob) she doesn't love me.

HEY. GoDDAMn it. The bird clock is off. Seven is the cooing mourning dove. My life is all off because it's chirruping like a chickadee. Hell and DAMNation, this is reminding me how I hate that clock and I've hated it for years and years and yet I change the battery for the chirping. I try to adjust it so that the blue jay hits 4 pm, like it's supposed to.

A while back I bought a train whistle clock intending to give that sucker to the people who gave us the bird clock. I think I gave it to a two-year-old instead. We're still waiting for the kid's parents to strike back.

Every time hideous things appear in the Sunday coupons sections, I think uh oh, I can only hope those parents don't comb the coupons, too.

Because, hoo mamma. ..

Here's how scary it can be--the figurine of Jesus playing football with adoring tots? It did not win for most jaw-droppingly tacky the week it showed up mixed in with the frozen food coupons. It lost points on the bathing suit (ie glittery goodness like genuine imitation inset crystal/24 carat gold paint/LED lights) portion of the weekly contest.

I can't remember the winner, but I bet it had something to do with the love of a particular breed of dogs, God, sports or the Blessings of Sisters/Grandchildren/Daughters.

Thomas Kinkade stuff often wins, but that's only because I have such a grudge against the man. Here's one the reasons why: Ruin my genre, will ya?
Warning, that links to MrsGiggles at her most vitriolic, so don't click unless you want a dose of loathing.

Comments

  1. Anonymous1:10 PM

    I thought the Jesus figurine was the punchline of something. You know... "Jesus Saves -- Jesus Scores!"

    I like the bird clock!

    ReplyDelete
  2. dean8:45 AM

    I remember that Jesus figurine from somewhere. When I first saw it, I thought it was an incarnation of the "Buddy Christ" from... Dogma, wasn't it?

    Kinkade? Ugh. Motel painting. It's all of a horrible flat Stanford-wife sameness.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Kate10:44 AM

    Naw, not that clever today, Aya.

    Jesus General uses Buddy Christ over at his blog. Happy, happy. And it's Stamford, Connecticut and Stepford, Fictional. One is a half hour from here. Both contain the original McMansions.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Kate10:44 AM

    Oh, Aya? you like the bird clock.
    heh.
    Be glad you're going home for Christmas

    ReplyDelete
  5. Bonnie Dee12:09 PM

    I have the bird clock, too, but let the bird battery run out. Then, when I finally replaced it, the songs were off and it was just too much trouble to figure it out, so I took the battery out again. Surprise. No one misses the birds chirping

    ReplyDelete

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