Thursday thirteen--things I hate about our upcoming car trip
1. our 11 year old van is cranky and due to blow up someday. Isn't tomorrow Friday the 13th?
2. kids won't agree on what tape to listen to, ever. Never. Ever. Even when they all want to hear the same thing, they won't agree on principle.
3. someone stole our portable TV/VHS tape player a few years back.
4. someone usually gets carsick.
5. that someone is usually me.
6. and a kid.
7. and, if he makes any gross sounds, the kid next to him.
8. Poor Mike has to fight his instinct to be like Mitt Romney. Not with the dog jammed up on the roof, but with the "we're not stopping except for gas, no matter what, hold it in" thing.
9. we don't have Uncle Andrew coming along this time. We hope he'll be there next time, the lucky, lucky man.
10. no dog this time, so no excuse to stop and go for a walk. (attention burglars. The big nasty dog is going to have a big nasty dog sitter staying with her. They will both be eating all the Eggo waffles from the freezer downstairs so your best bet is to lock 'em down there)
11. I can't leave my maze, don't make me leave my maze, I don't want to go, you can't make me go, stop it, I wanna go home, get me out of this car/strange place. message from my brain/body to me 24/7 which makes me a less than effective parental unit but a fairly efficient whine dispenser. This one might be more appropriate heading the list labeled "Thursday Thirteen Reasons Why Mike Hates Traveling with Me"
12. who's going to protect the nearly ripe peaches from the squirrels? (oh. the dog, as usual. But still... what if it all needs to be watered? the dog and the dog sitter aren't going to water the garden)
13 chocolate melts and gets on the steering wheel
2. kids won't agree on what tape to listen to, ever. Never. Ever. Even when they all want to hear the same thing, they won't agree on principle.
3. someone stole our portable TV/VHS tape player a few years back.
4. someone usually gets carsick.
5. that someone is usually me.
6. and a kid.
7. and, if he makes any gross sounds, the kid next to him.
8. Poor Mike has to fight his instinct to be like Mitt Romney. Not with the dog jammed up on the roof, but with the "we're not stopping except for gas, no matter what, hold it in" thing.
9. we don't have Uncle Andrew coming along this time. We hope he'll be there next time, the lucky, lucky man.
10. no dog this time, so no excuse to stop and go for a walk. (attention burglars. The big nasty dog is going to have a big nasty dog sitter staying with her. They will both be eating all the Eggo waffles from the freezer downstairs so your best bet is to lock 'em down there)
11. I can't leave my maze, don't make me leave my maze, I don't want to go, you can't make me go, stop it, I wanna go home, get me out of this car/strange place. message from my brain/body to me 24/7 which makes me a less than effective parental unit but a fairly efficient whine dispenser. This one might be more appropriate heading the list labeled "Thursday Thirteen Reasons Why Mike Hates Traveling with Me"
12. who's going to protect the nearly ripe peaches from the squirrels? (oh. the dog, as usual. But still... what if it all needs to be watered? the dog and the dog sitter aren't going to water the garden)
13 chocolate melts and gets on the steering wheel
I'm going out on a limb here and guessing there's not much relaxing and reading going on what with the arguing about videos and vomiting.
ReplyDeleteHave a ball at the Con, my dear. How did the Friday the Thirteenth drive go?
ReplyDeleteLiked your rant (above). I write because it's fun, so I guess I'm in safe territory, eh?
LOL. Glad I put down my drink before I read this one. I hope you had a good time? Is that possible? Perhaps shove your family out of the van?
ReplyDelete