if you visit us

if you see this sign I just put up in the bathroom? It's not directed at you unless you also miss the toilet when you pee. I'm done with that one, entirely.

If you live with teenaged males and have found a way to solve these issues without death or destruction, let me know.

These rules are to be followed or you will be required to shower/bathe/brush teeth at the gym at least there someone is paid to clean up after you

1. Dry off most of your body INSIDE THE TUB. Have the towel within reach when you shower. Dry off, mostly, THEN STEP OUT. The mat is there to mostly keep your feet from freezing, not act as a towel. If the mat does end up wet, hang it on the tub so it’ll dry out

2. When finished with your towel don’t just hang it up, spread it out on its own bar.

3. When you brush your teeth and spit, you will notice --HOLY CRAP!--there is gunk in the sink from your spitting. Every single time you spit. There will be stuff in the sink. EVERY SINGLE TIME. . FROM NOW ON , YOU WILL TAKE A SECOND TO RINSE OFF THIS GUNK. It’s easier to do while it’s still fresh and I’ve had enough of scrubbing off other people’s dried up gunk.

4. Pee in the goddamn toilet. Penalties for this one will be that you guys will be responsible for cleaning all the bathrooms.

Other bathroom rules and regulations will be added as I think of them.


  1. Every single time? Awww, Moooooom . . .

  2. The first place I ever worked had a similar sign in the bathroom. Was boggled: growing up in predominantly female family, bathroom cleanliness was never a problem. Jeeze, the first time I had to clean the bathroom, it was a revelation how filthy it could get in a week.

  3. About an hour after I put it up, I found my sign had been edited. . . Not vulgarly but still, little bassets have no breeding, no respect for authority. Someone ought to have taken them in hand way back when. Too late now, I guess.

  4. I said to myself just this week "I know for a fact I have never spit in a perfectly clean sink unless someone else was paid to clean it." No one else in my house, or the house I grew up in, ever cleaned their own toothpaste spit. It frustrates me to no end.

    My word verification is :hymen


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