thanks for asking

I'll be better soon.

I went years with only small occasional attacks that didn't run the show. This particular episode is very clearly in charge of the brain -- though I did manage to do a couple of errands today. And the bathrooms are so clean they scared the children.

Time again to practice the baffling koan art of Living With Panic as taught by those who basically teach the sufferer "Don't think about the phrases, simply live them" and "Don't not think about it". . .All part of the looking at a tree and not thinking about squirrels School of Cognitive Junk. Or rather being slammed face first into a tree over and over and reminding oneself that the tree is not charge.

But life will soon be sweet again. I have just signed up for Don Juan's tip of the day, discovered at Reese Witherfork's place. I will wow the girls with my indifference and they'll come over just to see why I'm ignoring them.

Here's a little gem from that site.

And it goes a little sumthin' *** like this:
1. Most men behave like WUSSIES when it comes to women and dating.
2. Women NEVER feel the powerful and magical emotion called ATTRACTION for WUSSIES.
So let's take them one at a time.
What exactly is a Wussy?
A Wussy is a guy who kisses up to women. . . There's more. Much, much more.


*** Q: Is there a more hideous way to write the word "something"?
A: No.


  1. Hey Katie,

    I was just checking out your profile picture. I feel so embarassed because I had no idea you were a cocker spaniel! Congradulations on writing novels! Wow, you must be, like, the "Good Will Hunting" of dogs.

    See you! Stay your cute self forever!!

  2. what? are you blind? COCKER SPANIEL?

    That's a mutt. rotweiler, german shepherd chow mix. We don't need no steenkin' pure breds.

  3. Cleaning bathrooms until they sparkle is a bad sign, lol!
    I'm glad you're feeling a little better. Hopefully things will be brighter soon - it's always depressing to be in the gray and dismal times.

  4. I was just kidding. I don't know squat about dogs. I'm a cat person.


  5. Maybe part of the tree-squirrel dynamic should really be centered on slamming your head against the toilet bowl until it sparkles in defeat in the face of your ruthless onslaught.

    I enjoy taking my frustrations out on bathrooms too. Shining faucets are strangely uplifting....

  6. Not many people know this, but wussy derives from a contraction of 'wimp' and 'pussy'.

    My dad had panic attacks all the time while we were growing up, and none of us knew. We were too fixated on my mother's mental problems.

  7. I agree, Douglas, usually the crazier of the two parents gets all the attention.

  8. Oh. My. Gosh. The 'wussy' guy is a piece of work!

    I couldn't help myself and read a few of his articles. I kept waiting for the punch line.

    Did I miss it?

  9. Enjoying the process of cleaning bathrooms is a clear sign of mental illness. I'll wait for the OBT to kick in and see if mine get cleaner, thanks.

  10. Kate--
    I used to have panic attacks, too, though not like yours. I would have them in the car (particularly in parking garages) and in shopping malls. The last one I had was on an airplane--I was convinced we were going to crash (and the evidence suggested as such).

    Anyway, though there was no barfing or bathroom cleaning involved, I at least have an idea of what you're talking about.

    You might check into something called Emotional Freedom Techniques. It's a type of "energy medicine" related to accupuncture or acupressure and seems to be particularly effective (and fast) in treating panic disorders. And I'm feeling better, thanks, 'cept I'm getting ready to take my cat to be put to sleep so kind of a bummer day.

  11. I don't know. "Sump'n" is also pretty hideous.

  12. god, yes, you're right, mary louisa


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