since it's easy

This is from Doug and doesn't require much, so fine I'll do it. SOON VERY VERY SOON. I will
1. Steal Bam's contest away
2. Feature Shirley Jump at last.
A week ago I was not around at least not so's you'd notice.
So to the meme:

The basic facts:
Who is your significant other? Michael
How long have you been together? Since 8/82 A longass time
Dating/Engaged/Married? very married.
How old is your S.O.? 52 and he's older by four years. Okay? Get it? We're old. OLD.
What’s his/her middle name? I bet he'd hate it if I said. Archer.

Which one?
Who eats more? Nowadays he does, usually, except if chocolate's involved. At the moment we're both outclassed by all three boys who can do amazing things especially to ice cream and cereal.
Who says "I love you" first? Both? Maybe? Why the hell don't I know the answers to these questions? It seems pretty damn basic, doesn't it? Maybe I'm sleeping through my marriage. Shit.
Who weighs more? He does but not enough more. (he's a runner so he stays pretty thin)
Who sings better? Depends on how much wine I've had
Who’s older? Him. Didn't we do this one
Who’s smarter? Him, except when it comes to a couple of things that have to do with life. Not science or math.....nosirreee. He's way smarter, like a gazillion and a half times smarter. INFINITY smarter.
Whose temper is worse? Who knows? Usually his, but he doesn't Allow It. He gets scary-quiet when he's mad.
Who does the laundry? It's a fight but he usually wins -- and does the laundry
Who does the dishes? Him, usually
Who sleeps on the right side of the bed? Him
Whose feet are bigger? His.
Whose hair is longer? Mine. His hair has never reached his butt. Mine's trying for mid-butt although I think it's done growing.
Who’s better with the computer? Him, probably--we're both relatively clueless. He's the Go To guy when anything breaks but there are a lot of sort-of/not=quite fixed things in our lives. Duct tape and wood glue and screws and wood left over from old projects.
Who mows the lawn? Him
Who pays the bills? I do, mostly with his money.
Who cooks dinner? Me, always and always and always
Who drives when you are together? He does.
Who pays when you go out to dinner? He does in the end even if I'm the one who pulls out the credit card.
Who's the most stubborn? Him, and I won't change my mind about that one
Who is the first one to admit when they’re wrong? Me? Him? Who knows who really means it?
Whose parents do you see more? no one any more. Used to be mine but when they shuffled off, we were basically parent-free.
Who named your dog? He did, but the boys insisted on the spelling.
Who kisses who first? Huh? Kisses what first? When?
Who asked who out? We never went out on a date. We met at a friend's house, slept together that night, learned each other's last names soon after and moved in together about a week later.
Who's more sensitive? Who the hell knows? Me right now, him usually maybe. WHO THE HELL CARES? Quit looking at me like that. Dammit.
Who's taller? He is.
Who has more friends? I used to have lots and lots and lots and lots of friends. Now we're about the same because I'm a hermit and practicing to be a female curmudgeon. There has to be a better word for that than shrew, dammit.
Who has more siblings? Me. Five.
Who wears the pants in the relationship? What the hell kinda question is THAT? Pants? What the fuck do pants have to do with anything? Who's in charge? Him! All the time! Constantly . . . except at the moment. See what I mean? You so don't want me doing regular blogging just now. I mean it. I'm in Lewis Black mode. Luckily my kids think it's funny.