Private Life Check In
I'm printing out manuscripts. We're talking about half a box of paper, hundreds of pages, nearly three reams. Holy shit, I sure am a chatty person. My main emotion about the mountains of paper is embarrassment. Who are you to use up those natural resources? What makes you think your work is worth a minute of an editor's time? Naturally this is just a stage. Later on, when those editors send rejections, my outrage will be directed at them.
I'm telling you, the writer's lot is one of ego inflation, ego deflation and other really silly bits of torture, mostly self-inflicted.
Speaking of torture devices, have I mentioned my printer is 13 years old and cranky? It jams every 20 or so pages just to remind me who's in charge. I have to dissect it, fish out scraps of paper, reassemble it and then reassure it I love it. I do, too. HP Laserjet 4P, my fourth favorite baby.
As the stuff clunks out of the machine, I turn over and read random pages and immediately see how I could improve that sentence, cut that paragraph, use a stronger word there, get a little drunk and land in jail. . . Right. Put down that paper, Rothwell. Back away from the manuscript.
A lot of Bosnian action this week--mostly carting ladies around town. One of them is trying to save enough money to go back to Bosnia. The others have been telling her she's nuts, I think. They yammer in Bosnian and I listen, picking up a word here and there.
One thousand for the tickets? they want too much.
If any of you live in Hartford, come see us Sunday. We're going to be at the Unitarian Church on ummmmm . . . errrrr damn. I'm talking about the Unitarian Church that looks like a public swimming pool--it's near Prospect. We'll be in the basement at 11, selling socks, rugs etc. Buy some. If you ask nicely, I'll give you some of my borek.
The ladies always give me borek when I give them rides. They don't have money but they have an endless supply of borek and baklava. When I cart Afghans around they give me yummy nut pastries too. They all hand me food and watch like the elementary school lunch monitors to make sure I eat it. Urrp.
I'm telling you, the writer's lot is one of ego inflation, ego deflation and other really silly bits of torture, mostly self-inflicted.
Speaking of torture devices, have I mentioned my printer is 13 years old and cranky? It jams every 20 or so pages just to remind me who's in charge. I have to dissect it, fish out scraps of paper, reassemble it and then reassure it I love it. I do, too. HP Laserjet 4P, my fourth favorite baby.
As the stuff clunks out of the machine, I turn over and read random pages and immediately see how I could improve that sentence, cut that paragraph, use a stronger word there, get a little drunk and land in jail. . . Right. Put down that paper, Rothwell. Back away from the manuscript.
A lot of Bosnian action this week--mostly carting ladies around town. One of them is trying to save enough money to go back to Bosnia. The others have been telling her she's nuts, I think. They yammer in Bosnian and I listen, picking up a word here and there.
One thousand for the tickets? they want too much.
If any of you live in Hartford, come see us Sunday. We're going to be at the Unitarian Church on ummmmm . . . errrrr damn. I'm talking about the Unitarian Church that looks like a public swimming pool--it's near Prospect. We'll be in the basement at 11, selling socks, rugs etc. Buy some. If you ask nicely, I'll give you some of my borek.
The ladies always give me borek when I give them rides. They don't have money but they have an endless supply of borek and baklava. When I cart Afghans around they give me yummy nut pastries too. They all hand me food and watch like the elementary school lunch monitors to make sure I eat it. Urrp.
Right. Put down that paper, Rothwell. Back away from the manuscript.
ReplyDeleteLOL on that one! Torture, isn't it?
Kate:
ReplyDeleteI had the same printer you did, only I didn't love it. I bought Samsung's ML-1740, based on feedback from cnet.com, and am much less frustrated. If you love your printer, fine, but otherwise you don't have to suffer.
Love the carting the ladies about and getting baklava and borek, lol!
ReplyDeleteI had an Algerian neighbor who only came over for holidays. She'd march up to my door holding a platter of pastries covered in ten feet of saran wrap.
"For you!" she'd say, "I made them for you!" And then she'd stand there while I unwrapped the tray, and she'd point to the ones I had to try first (while she watched and nodded happily).
She made excellent pastries, thank goodness, lol.
I love baklava but don't know borek. What is it and is it as good as it sounds?
ReplyDeleteborek looks like a spiral and is a sort of dumpling or pastie. A thin crust with filling sort of jobbie. It's usually got meat or cheese or cheese and spinach. I just ate about six pounds of it today....gawd.
ReplyDeleteand Megan, I'm saving that printer number. My HP is jamming more and more often. Evil jamming genies at work.