I just read another list of Ten People to Unfriend on Facebook. Sheesh, what downer. So many finger-shaking tsk tsk bad puppy lists. They couldn't be more annoyed if those rule-breaking facebookers actually came to their house and peed on the new carpet.
That's really the only reason I'm writing this, an anti-anti response. It's not like I actually care what you write on your facebook page. I'll read your page because it's easy to do, and something other than working, and because some of you I like and miss, even if I've never met you, Ann C.
A GOOD FACEBOOKER
1. Lets anyone post, even people who disagree. That means some good, passionate discussion can happen.
2. Shuts down the shit. Any internet thread anywhere will contain crap-o-la. Trolls happen and then there are the people who resort to ad hominem when they get angry. Good facebookers will stop that useless conversation. Or if they don't, their responses are smart-assed enough to make the nasty poster look silly.
3. Is willing to change her mind. Enough outside evidence is presented to make him rethink a long-held belief.
4. Is funny. So what if his posts are all just sharing Takei. Some of that shit is v. funny. FUNNY HAH HAHA HA.
5. Makes his or her own memes. Those might show insider jokes but that's okay. Insider jokes are fine now and again because feeling confused is good for those of us on the outside.
6. Might do vaguebooking but usually describes what's going on, eventually. Sometimes a "today sucks" is all she wrote. Hey, her page, her emotes, I got that. Go for it on occasion.
7. If he writes about the weather, it'll be funny or pithy or tragic -- or knowledgeable because she's a meteorologist. (and speaking of insider: Lyons and Drager FTW Goddamn, I love their explanations).
8. When he asks for advice he tells us what he decided to do. Because we're nosy like that.
9. Knows the Daily Currant is satire. I wasn't going to go hostile, but really, fuck you, Daily Currant. You're the only thing on the planet that makes me feel sort of sorry for Sarah Palin.
10. Warns us that the video she posted will contain an earworm. Except did you know rick-rolling is coming back? Ancient history for the internet is fresh again? Or not.
11. Posts goats. Those rascals are still not old.
12. Also chickens.